Embarrassed For You
It doesn't take a graphics geek to tell you this sign is hideous. But most laypersons would see this sign, squint their eyes, shrug their shoulders...and walk away unaffected.
Let us go through some reasons this should outrage you, the innocent passerby:
1. CRaig, is this a predetermined typeface? Something your graphic designer purchased for actual money? Wait a second, wait a second, wait a second...I take that back. Likely not your graphic designer. (My sincerest apologies to actual GDs i may have offended!) Your eight year old daughter designed this using her Hannah Montana font! And you thought it was soooo cute...Awwwwwwwwww...*gag* Well, it's not. Unless, of course you're eight years old, a girl and your shop is selling a variety of colorful concoctions made with high-fructose corn syrup.
2. Is this a custom typeface? Even worse, CRaig. EVEN WORSE! This looks like a ransom letter written by someone on hallucinogens for someone selling hallucinogens. If that's what you're going for, okay, I'm listening. But tricking people into thinking they need glasses, is really not the best business plan. Or wait, are these those special spectacles I've heard about...?
3. Is this typeface used just for your store signage or did you pay money and kill trees to print this on your business cards as well? One can only imagine the microscopic size of the text on these puppies. Not that anyone can read the text sized at 200 point font anyways. CRaig, let's be conscious of our carbon footprint...Save the trees!
4. What ungodly creature are you marketing towards? Some nine-eyed sea creature dreamed up in one of your hallucinogenic episodes? And why are the 'p' and 'i' in different shaped polygons? Is this code for people who need a Private Investigator? You also provide that service? Or wait, you sell night-vision goggles. Tough economic times. It's good to diversify. Good for you, CRaig. Good. For. You.
5. Setting aside the obvious offense this sign makes towards myself and anyone with the the acuity to 'read' the sign, there are (*gasp!*) ways this sign could be improved despite the typeface. Yes, I'm going there.
a. Spacing - spread out the 'CRaig ScoTt' text so each character can be appreciated and admired in its full glory. (Bear with me here...)
b. Stylization - be selective. Either use Hannah Montana type for the 'CRaig ScoTt' part or the 'opticians' part, but not both. Or, here's a radical thought: Neither. And while we're on the topic of stylization, let's figure out how to appropriately use the intermingling of Upper Case and Lower Case. I'll refer you to my 'ransom note' comment in Point 2, above.
c. Balance - The relationship of object (here, text) and background (here, black) is off-balance. By centering the signage text, there's too much going on in the middle, and nothing going on to the left and right. Don't fear asymmetry, CRaig! Asymmetry is your friend. Asymmetry is your Barney.
d. Duh - Get rid of the scalloped edge on the awning. What is this, a cupcake shop? Nice try.
I'm not sure whether to give CRaig credit for NOT blasting this already overwhelming signage graphic with color. I can just see the colors now: bright reds, yellows, and blues....Every hue known to man! *gag* But then again, maybe that was the original intent, then he found out it cost too much and the color concept got the ax. Yeah, no credit. Sorry, buddy.
CRaig, if by chance you see this and use suggestions noted in Point 5a-5b, shoot me an email and I will send you an invoice. Thanks in advance!
Yours Truly,
FoPo
(Photo Credit: Lieutenant TrueType)
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